EggGenie - Dictated by Dr. James "Papfroidle" Johnson, PhD Disclamer: He is not a certified physician.- Typed by Josiah "Oh Snap" Johnson

The other day I was driving my Lincoln, then I thought, there must be something better. After all, my car barely gets dented in an accident, it has remarkable low end torque, and has lots of trunk space and interior leg room. So naturally I wanted something more. So, I went home and decided to look for cars for sale. I found a Mustang in perfect condition for $100. It was obviously too expensive. Then I found a Porsche 911 for $25. Again, I didn't want to sell the farm just to buy a car. And that's not a figure of speech, I just didn't want to sell my farm. So I continued on to find nothing but junk, Hemi Cudas for $500, Vipers for $30, a Saleen S7 for free... I just ended up with a headache. Who knew it would be so hard to find something good? I turned on the TV to watch George Lopez, who is not at all cocky or vulgar, and he is funny like he thinks he is. Then a commercial came on for a Kia Soul with three hamsters driving it and the commercial made great points like that the Soul is better than driving a cardboard box, a toaster, or a washing machine. in fact, here's the commercial at hand: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfJnqbudMzs
Naturally I decided to buy one. After all, they start at under $14K, and they have nearly as much metal as the average stapler, which is a lot for Kia. And, if you ever get a flat, you just take a spare right off a Hot Wheels car and pop it on. Plus they're great for storage. You just drive any ordinary weight vehicle over one and slide the conveniently flattened car right under your bed. The car is nearly as high quality as the Chevy Corvair that was so great it got heavy acclaim in books such as Unsafe at any Speed by Ralph Nader. So, anyway, I went straight to the nearest Kia dealership and walked right inside. To my immediate shock and awe, there were no large hamsters. Only normal size humans... I walked right out the door, realizing that the entire appeal was the hamsters. Then the next day I saw this Toyota commercial....

Source: http://fabiojanquez.blogspot.com/2010/08/egggenie-dictated-by-dr-james.html