A Path of Passion 1

These past couple of days I've been on a sort of retreat at home, pondering over my future direction. My friend, Pat, gifted me an incredibly useful Tarot reading in relation to my health. It was spot on and I decided to take time to step back, assess my direction and simplify my life. This was coupled with a flare-up of fibromyalgia which was painful and immobilising. I also have arthritis of the spine which also restrains my mobility a bit. It really caused me to think over where I'm going with my life, so this is a summary of my decisions.



I have given away the idea of getting a business up and running. I have had to be truthful with myself and own up to the fact that I don't have the energy or the passion. I don't have the skills or inclination to get a fully functioning website up and running. Nor am I a good salesperson, I have a feeling of revulsion at pushing my work or products on people. I'd far rather they support my work through personal choice than by me banging on about what I do. I also take note of how my body feels these days and I know that firstly, fibromyalgia is quite unpredictable and I never know when I am going to have a flare-up. They come out of the blue and the one thing I've learned is that you can't bash your way through, you have to sit back and wait it out until the pain and foghead lift, and life resumes a somewhat normal course. Secondly, when I think of trying to organise classes, workshops or website work, my body feels tired, which is a sure sign I'm not doing what is good for my overall health, passion and direction.


As a result of all this, I'm narrowing my focus to my art and writing, and letting go of any diversionary tactics into highways and byways to avoid focusing on what really brings passion into my life. I'm sure we've all got our various procastination techniques and mine is stuffing around on news sites and Facebook, so I'm afraid Facebook won't be seeing so much of me in future.


I find it interesting that my last astro-crystal mandala was the simplest I've been drawn to create since I started this whole process. I feel it reflects my growing wish to focus on what feeds my own heart and soul instead of flailing around trying to focus on too many cul-de-sacs which are draining my energy.


It's been rather a good feeling actually, and while I'm not wholly recovered from the fibro flare-up, I'm grateful to it for bringing me to a halt and partiicipating in a period of reflection and soul-searching I may well have tried to fudge and avoid otherwise.


My writing includes my books and my blogs. I feel excited to be focusing again on my artwork (and thanks to Deborah for the heads-up that art would be popping up in my life again). And I actually feel a lot lighter for making the decision to look after myself and narrow my focus to what I really love doing.

I'm explaining it at length here so that perhaps, if you have similar concerns, you might also feel drawn to take some time to sort out where you're heading and what really lifts your spirits and draws on your gifts and talents.

Source: http://wildwomancrazycrone.blogspot.com/2010/08/path-of-passion-1.html