Miss Universe 2010 | Others | 08-24-2010

Miss Universe 2010
Live from Mandalay Bay, Las Vegas
Hosted by Bret Michaels and Natalie Morales

Fucking shit. Fucking shit Raj, you could've won. This, for me, is the most intense Miss Universe in the entire history of Miss Universe's I've watched. It's probably because Miss Philippines exceeded all expectations and pushed through 'till the top five!

After I finished watching the live coverage from Star World, I just had to go online and post about this. Oh and look, ABS CBN's still not finished with their coverage. I don't know but they seem to have 30 minute delays and 30 minute commercials for the entire duration of the show. They're crazy. Never trust local channel coverage.

You know what's funny? How the host Morales kept elbowing Michaels because he's so distracted. It's like every time they're on camera, she elbows him on instinct. Well, it's not the rockstar's fault, there were 83 girls sharing the stage with him, who the hell wouldn't be distracted?

Okay, let's run through the top five.

Miss Australia: This bitch looks like she's been ripped off by Disney Channel and went to Miss Universe for her sweet revenge. Fuck. She looks like a sad copycat of Miley Cyrus and her expressions remind me of those Disney fucks that are totally miserable and hopeless. No wonder she won Miss Congeniality, she's so fucking Disney it makes me sick.

Miss Ukraine: I don't really know what to make out of this woman. In her interviews, she sounds like a retarded blonde that's reading straight from a script. On the stage however, she shines like a golden tooth in a mouth full of decay (kudos to Miss J. Alexander). For me, Ukraine is the prettiest among the top five. Elegant and poised, but I'm really not feeling the energy from her. She's like a big blob of negativity and nothing-ness.

Miss Jamaica: Woah Beyonce Knowles! She's doing the queen walk everywhere she goes. Her arms go epileptic and her smile reaches her nape. If Ukraine is the epitome of nothing, then Jamaica is the epitome of everything... almost. She's my second favorite out of the bunch. She's so... all over the place, in a good way.

Miss Philippines: Venus Raj. Oh my God, you made my heart skip beats in all the eliminations. She was the last to be called in the top 15 and the top 5. Who would not suffer from a heart attack? I honestly thought she had no fucking chance because of that Mendoza incident yesterday. But man, top 5. That hasn't happened in a long time. I mean, Philippines won two Miss Universe's, in '69 and in '73 (no, this is not stock knowledge, I am not that gay). When it came to the final five, I thought she could win. Raj is immediately charming and appealing, her energy's second to the powerhouse Jamaica. God damn it.

Miss Mexico: Man, I didn't even notice Mexico. I didn't even know she was in the top 5, I was totally focusing on the other people! I just realized she was actually there when it came to announcing the winner. What the fuck right? Totally forget-able. I don't even remember how she looks like. Fail.

I don't remember the exact positions but Philippines came in 4th runner up, Jamaica is 1st runner up and surprisingly Mexico is Miss Universe 2010. I don't even know her name.

But oh well, congratulations to that Mexican girl and good job Raj, really good job. Apart from that retarded answer in the Q&A portion, good job. But you know, that's a really really difficult question. That's probably the hardest impromptu question in the history of mankind. What's the biggest mistake you made and how did you fix it? Come on, how can you possibly think of a witty reply to that in 30 seconds with a huge ass crowd in front of you, not to mention every living being is on their televisions watching. What would you say? Oh, I broke up with the man of my dreams and I fixed it by burning all the letters he gave me and deleting his phone number? It's so unfair, all the others got easy questions.

Damn. Raj could've bagged it. Maybe in another lifetime.

Source: http://waytoofancy.blogspot.com/2010/08/miss-universe-2010-live-from-mandalay.html