Meetng "The Sprinkler Guy"

This is the first time I was to meet the guy my mother is married to.  Before this encounter, the only time I had heard his actual name, (Bruce) was when he was hired, and working for my parents doing the iron work on the house my parents built together.  I never actually knew what he looked like.  I just knew the name of the company, and the name of his son who worked for him, and his name.  Needless to say, It was fairly easy to put things together once names started flying. 

My first encounter with the 'Sprinkler Guy' was not long after we moved into the Hill Crest house (this was the house my Grandpa bought for my Mother so she could move out of my parents house before the divorce)  It was built like 200BC though.  Some call it "quaint,"  I called it "cold" in the winter. This house needed a lot of work.  I happened to be home alone one afternoon when I noticed a person trolling through the yard I had recently been able to claim as apart of my own.  I guessed him at about 5'9, but it was hard to judge from the primate like posture.  The top of his head was bare, but the sparse white, ponytail that came to his shoulders made up for the lack of vegetation on top of his skull.  His goatee highlighted his full set of chompers that were neither very white, nor fit proportionately in his mouth.  It looked like something was about to give in his cranium.  I digress- His appearance was not the reason I initially didn't approve of his presence. 

I see this cave man character tromping around the yard I have recently been able to claim as something I care about because I will be residing here for the majority of the week.  This is my "home" for the time being, therefore I feel responsible for making sure it is not violated while I am there.  He is not welcome as far as I am concerned.  This feeling could be accentuated by the fact I am suspicious my mother is seeing someone, and I had expected that person to randomly come to the house posing as a non threat, trying to infiltrate the system while both my sister and my guards are down.  No such luck. Pal. 

After watching him survey the yard, I walked out to the porch, crossed my arms, waited and watched as he walked from sprinkler head to sprinkler head in the yard until he noticed me.  He looked up, and was startled to see there was someone watching him.  It was almost a guilty acknowledgement.   He knew he was not going to be welcomed with open arms.  But he sure tried.
I let my stare linger for an uncomfortable few seconds more as he decided how he wanted to approach this situation.  Then I introduced myself. 

"Hi, may I help you?"  O.K.  I didn't introduce myself in the formal sense of the term, but I had a feeling he knew who I was. His response was pretty benign:
"Oh, Hi!, I am a friend of your mom's.  I am here to help with the sprinkler system."
My facial expression stayed as impressed as I felt.
"OK. well she isn't here right now.  I will tell her you stopped by though"
He was a little taken back.  I learned later, most people don't talk to him like this.  He happens to be hot shit in the thug community, apparently. 
He left shortly after our meeting.  I waited for my mother to return home so I could tell her how I saved the house from the scary Neanderthal Man.  She was not as impressed as I was with myself...
As she started to unload groceries with me, I causally slipped in "Oh, the Sprinkler Guy came by."

She paused for a moment, and asked me to repeat myself. 

"The Sprinkler Guy.  He came over to help.  I told him you were not here and I would tell you he stopped by." 

This made her furious.  I am not sure if it was because I had turned him away in a sense, called him "The Sprinkler Guy"referring to him as "the help" or because her little secret was about to be blown, and she knew it.  She asked coolly "Do you mean Bruce?" 
I was on the right track to sniffing something out, so I played along. 
"I don't know his name, the Sprinkler Guy, the one you asked to help with it?  He never introduced himself.  Do you mean a stocky man, Neanderthal looking, white hair,bald on top with a ponytail, substantial gut, and big protruding teeth?" 
These were the exact coordinates to push the "Loose Your Shit Button."  She let out a lecture on what kind of person  Bruce is, and can be, and how much of an "old wise Indian" he is. The term "Old, wise Indian" is still lost on me as to why she would use these words as descriptors in describing this man.  Either way, The term "The Sprinkler Guy" was cemented into my mind.  I was like a bully on a fat kid.  Relentless, when it came to bringing up the taboo subject of my mothers new found "handyman"  he will forever be "The Sprinkler Guy."